GUILT

People talk about discipline, sacrifice, workload and focus, but almost no one talks about guilt. It’s the hidden cost of trying to be great at more than one thing. It’s the voice that shows up when you’re training, working or trying to be present at home, telling you that you’re falling short somewhere else. 

The part no one prepares you for

If I’m training, I feel like I should be working or with my wife and kids.
If I’m working, I feel like I’m letting my family down or falling behind as an athlete.
If I’m with my family, I feel the weight of everything I haven’t done yet.
It’s a constant loop, and it’s with me every single day.

What makes guilt so exhausting is that even when I’m physically present, my mind isn’t always there with me. I’ll be sitting with my kids, but my head is still inside the programming I need to finish. I’ll be training, but I’m thinking about my wife holding things together at home. High performance requires selfishness, and when you’re also trying to be a husband, a dad, a coach and a gym owner, that selfishness cuts both ways. It gives you the drive, but it also creates the tension.

When guilt stops meaning failure

For a long time, I thought guilt meant I was failing. Failing as a father, failing as a husband, failing as an athlete, failing as a coach. Now I understand it differently. Guilt doesn’t mean you’re doing life wrong. Guilt means you care deeply about multiple things that matter. It means you’re trying to SHOW UP everywhere that counts, even when the math of your life doesn’t allow it perfectly.

I haven’t solved guilt, but I’ve learned to live with it better. I try to be fully present in whatever role I’m in, even if the day isn’t perfect. Some days I’m a great dad and an average athlete. Some days I’m dialled in at the gym but behind on work. Some days, everything feels out of balance. That’s what juggling actually looks like: messy, imperfect, constantly shifting.

Learning to live with the trade-offs

And through all of it, I remind myself of one line every day:

“You can do anything, just not everything at once” 

That mindset keeps me from burning out trying to live up to an unrealistic standard I can’t actually meet. It gives me space to breathe, adjust and keep moving forward without tearing myself apart from the inside.

If you’re an athlete, a parent, a coach or anyone trying to hold multiple things together, I want you to know this: guilt doesn’t mean you’re failing. Some days you’ll feel like you’re crushing it. Some days you’ll feel behind in every area of your life. That doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.

Keep SHOWING UP with intention.
Keep adjusting when things go sideways.
Keep a cool head when life gets loud.

And remember, you’re doing far better than guilt will ever let you believe.