FIRST, LET ME START BY SAYING I LOVED BEING PREGNANT

It’s maybe not the narrative you hear most of the time, but I loved every part of it. I was fascinated by the body changes. I loved all of the little feelings. I had a very easy pregnancy, it was uneventful, which in this circumstance is a good thing. The most notable thing I remember is my feet hurt but that’s to be expected when you rapidly gain 40 pounds – the bonus to that is I have a very sweet baby daddy who gave me nightly foot rubs. One thing I found most challenging was learning the limits of my new body, my new and more limited capacity for mental load and physical limits. All welcome to challenges and all things that helped prepare me for the next stage. 

A constant theme for me that I often reflected on was “WOW, I am grateful for my fitness”. As I write, I’m 6 months postpartum and astonished to say I’m starting to feel like ME again. I loved working out during pregnancy. It took me some time to realize it was a different kind of working out – the focus was simply moving my body in some way. It wasn’t about mastering new skills or hitting any kind of PRs. 

Some days it was 15 minutes, in my slippers and PJs rolling through a handful of movements just to get the blood flowing, while other days I was able to crush a full 45-minute HWPO SWEAT. Coming back after the baby, starting was the hardest part. Everything is so new and even this body that I’d known for 34 years is all new to me now.

MY HISTORY WITH FITNESS

I have been active all my life. I played sports since I was five all the way through high school. During college, I frequented the student fitness center. When I graduated college, I found CrossFit. Like many of us that find the sport, I was bit by the bug and I was ALL IN. 

HOOKED. After a few years, I started coaching at a CrossFit gym. It was how I spent my social time outside of work. I enjoyed a few local team competitions with friends but mainly just enjoyed the “fitness for fun” side of things. When I met Mat, I loved how fitness was something we shared. If he had a second session of rowing intervals, I’d pull up a rower next to him and get to work. While the paces, meters, effort, etc. were different, the time spent together was shared.

MY PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE

I leaned on fitness mostly for mental clarity during pregnancy. It’s an uncertain time with constant changes (perfect foreshadowing for the next 18-20 years). During my first trimester I struggled a lot with fatigue. I was lucky if I could work out twice in a week. The way I got through it was to simply start moving my body. I wouldn’t set the clock and most times I wouldn’t even change out of work clothes (although let’s be honest, I work in workout clothes). I’d simply pick three movements and start rolling through 10 to 20 reps. My goal was to do three rounds. I knew most times, if I completed those three rounds, I’d be ready for more. If once those three rounds were done, and I was done, I was happy to have moved my body in some way. I also did a lot of walking. Thankfully, I was pregnant during mostly warm months and was able to keep a 2-mile country road in this routine.

Once I got through the first trimester, my energy came barreling back. I maintained working out 5 to 6 times a week all 45 minutes to an hour, and 95% of that was just simply doing an HWPO SWEAT workout modified as I grew bigger. 

They say “listen to your body” and boy was that hard to learn at first because it’s a NEW body. 

As I became more confident in this new body, I knew I had to keep fitness FUN. I would modify movements in SWEAT to things I wanted to do at times knowing that was going to help me be the most successful with movement. I think it’s important in those moments to choose the path of least resistance.

Our baby girl was due six days after the CrossFit Games which you can imagine added only a little bit of stress to our household. To our surprise, she arrived 15 days past her due date. As I got closer to the actual due date, I definitely slowed down. Can you blame me? I was huge! I was still working out, but the pace was definitely much slower. The movements were much more intentional. 

In the last two weeks before she was born, I did roughly 3 hours of GOWOD each day. I no longer wanted to workout, I wanted to just “prepare” – whatever that means because I had no clue what I was getting into with birth. 

BIRTH WAS A MARATHON, NOT A SPRINT 

My goal all along was to do a homebirth. Contractions started around 2 PM on a Saturday afternoon and by 11 PM I was an active labor. I rolled through active labor from 11 PM until 7 AM Sunday morning when my midwife broke my water. At that time, the real work began. 

I pushed for about three hours with very little progress from baby girl. We tried everything and in some of those moments I wondered if I'd done all I could to prepare. Our bodies are incredible and I had no clue what I was doing. After a few hours of pushing with no progress, I’d suggested we transfer to the hospital to be ready for whatever may need to happen to get things moving. After about 40 minutes of “not pushing” (an impossible task to an involuntary act), we made it to the hospital. I continued to push for another hour and baby girl made her entrance! I was able to deliver naturally and without any complications. The trip to the hospital must have helped her get into a better position because once there, things started moving along. She did come out “sunny side up”, which means she was head down but facing the wrong direction which makes it more challenging for traveling through the birth canal. In the end, I got my baby and she was healthy! I’m so proud of that experience and so grateful for my support team – especially Mat.

MY POSTPARTUM EXPERIENCE

For those mamas out there it’s really one of those IYKYK experiences. My body was pretty rocked from birth, which I think is a pretty understandable statement, even if you’ve never given birth. It took me much longer to come back to fitness than I anticipated. I was given clearance to start back into fitness at six weeks but I could just feel my body wasn’t ready for it. Trust me, mentally I wanted to work out, but physically, I knew I wasn’t ready. Instead, I focused on the routine and finding time for myself. My body was different, my energy was different, my priorities were different. It was hard to even do simple movements like burpees and felt like I had the spark I once had. I took almost 12 weeks of no fitness after Eddy was born. I grounded myself in my new role, I went for walks and spent time in the gym without moving. When I did come back, it was slow. 

There were a few shed tears and a few moments of wondering “is it all gone?”— probably mostly just the postpartum hormones playing tricks on me. I worked my way back slowly. The first few weeks, I was lucky if I could complete 20-30 minutes of a 45-minute SWEAT, whether it was because of my body, energy or the baby’s nap schedule. I told myself it didn’t have to be perfect, I just had to SHOW UP. Each time I showed up, I got a little more accomplished. Each time I showed up, I got a little more confident. Each time I showed up, I remembered a little more about a past ME. Here I am today, 6 months postpartum, training for a marathon knowing my fitness was not gone, it was just on a much-needed break.